Have you ever wondered why men would rather want a silent and solemn environment after-work? Men hibernate in their houses after work, from the chaos of masculinity – the work and the search for livelihood. At the end of the day, a male human comes home to his lair (home), gives his wife and kids a hug, then plops down on the couch to hibernate for the night. Subconsciously, asking for some space. Which is exactly what he wants. In accordance to Dr. Joy Browne’s book – ‘It’s a Jungle Out There, Jane – Understanding the Male animal).

For a man, home is his turf, and the turf is where one plants their feet. It’s where the man is perceived as the king of his castle, lord of the manor, lion of the den, bear of the lair. The notion that “it is my house, my woman, my kids, my responsibilities, my control” is so deeply ingrained in most guys’ psyches that it persists even if a man co-owns his home with his wife.

Once the bear settles in his lair or the lion in his den, the man’s mind feels free enough to now allow his silent screams to reel on his mind. Though, physically he is present at home, but emotionally he is lost in a world that is wounded, a world that is a maze whose ways he is trying to chart through each day.

Many men are aching inside, with trembling souls soaked in anger and frustration. Some are yearning for a father’s embrace when it’s too late to find one. Some are lions in the pack who have failed to break through the other members to emerge the best, or sometimes the worries of how to make ends meet frustrates.

When men are alone with their thoughts, they are lost in what we call the Maze of Masculinity; the thought is continuous and it ends with an unsolved puzzle. Some men have been able to solve the puzzle of the Maze of Masculinity and they never did it alone.

It is high time we seek peace by sharing our thoughts, by understanding that getting through the Maze of masculinity is not a one Man’s job. We need to think of the future and start raising sons who will be men who can talk about their issues and get out of the Maze of Masculinity.

To build the renewed MANE (Masculinity in A New Era) we desire, we need to help our young males navigate the Maze of masculinity without damaging their inner peace.

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Contributor – Andrea Otieno

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